It's Man Code

Gillian, blinded by man worship.

Hi all! First of all -- a shout-out to my friends in Northern California! Nice to know I have a following there! Can't wait to come back there for a visit!

OK - so down to business. Credit goes to all of you guys who caught my (ahem) uncharacteristic mistake about foot fetish guy, who is indeed alive and well and very much still in the game. I think I must have been so overwhelmed by the enormous gang of lunkhead crazies they gathered for this season that I was dizzy and lost my way....but yes, my mistake.

So once again, our girl won me over by starting this week's episode talking about how she's not your typical "big boob model" type (Trista fans - pay attention) but I have to say that overall, I found Gillian kind of a disappointment this week. Granted, I know I'm being kind of ridiculous, trying to hold her to an unrealistic feminist standard that is completely non-existent in the world of a reality tv dating show -- but I don't care!!!! I feel a little betrayed.

When she was dating Jason last season, she was so independent and spunky and smart. But now, she's all "I always fall for the bad guy" and I can't drive because "Ha Ha I'm a girl!" and the one that really made me gag on my cheerios, I really think he can "take care of me." Ach!!! What's happening to her?? Is the experience of being totally worshipped and lusted after by 20 hot guys just making her totally nuts? Wait a minute....Now that I say it, now that I think about it....that might honestly make me a little insane too. Or anyone insane! Ok fine. I'm going to grant dear Gillian, who I've loved in the past, a diagnosis of temporary insanity, and hope that as the number of guys dwindle, her sense and strength will return.

David, he of the crazy eyes and man code of stupidity.

So, as for tonight's show, there really isn't too much to say. Car races, bank vaults and the Harlem Globetrotters. I don't think the producers know what to do with this many guys either! But here's what I think we learned that was most important: Wes and David are very clearly both bad news. Wes is your basic self-involved asshole, plain and simple. And David is just dumb, violent and scary! "Let's tie him to a tree!" Really?? You're that pissed at Juan for not being a jocky testosterone-soaked freak like you? Wow. He and his "man-code" need to GO.

Me likey.

The other very clear thing -- and it was already clear to me last week -- is that Jake is positively aces. And tonight, I think I fell a little bit in love with the guy. That was a pretty lovely date they had and perhaps the other guys should all just go home right now. Except that I have a big old crush on Michael, who I really hope sticks around a while.

Otherwise, there is the Juan question, and while I certainly don't think he's the devil like David does, I don't entirely trust him either. He seems a bit rehearsed, but also sometimes genuine and sweet. Too soon to tell. And then there are some other guys who we just don't know well enough yet but who seem like they could be pretty cool - Reid, Robby, Kiptyn, Ed....

Awesome! Now that I showed her my wiener, I'm sure to get a rose!!

But with all the disappointments and weirdness and unnecessary basketball that was last night's episode, there was ONE very very happy moment which made it all worthwhile....and you know what I'm talking about. Good ol' "hey there little hottie" Brian, the hick idiot extraordinaire, decided to take all his clothes off and jump in the pool because that was all his little tiny brain (and apparently that's not all that was little and tiny) could come up with to get Gillian's attention. And yes, she finally sent him home. And probably not because of he did that, but because he's a hick idiot. So, his humiliating send-off was just gravy.

Here's to less gimmicks and less guys next week.