We're happy. Done deal. Best Friends. True Love.

Is Jenni the girl to beat?


Hi again, kids! So, I think this has to be one of the funniest episodes I've ever seen. I was just laughing the whole way through. I mean, you knew the way they were plugging Bettina's meltdown that it was going to be good, but the actual moment was just really sad. What was hilarious was how before every commercial break, they found a new way to crazily exaggerate what was coming up, until they finally said: "Coming up, the most shocking goodbye EVER -- when Hillary LOSES HER MIND." That's what they actually said!!! I thought I must have imagined it at first!! Like that's something that I would say out loud to make fun of the show! I really think that Chris Harrison was just joking around at rehearsal, and he said that, and they just kept it because it was freaking hilarious.


Somebody get me away from this crazy woman.


Oh -- I know. Poor thing was so confused she thought Brad was saying he loved her when he was saying you're going home. Although, he did say he wanted to be straight with her and then I didn't understand a word he was saying. I think he was just so nervous because he KNEW she just did not compute. 'Cause she's talking to the camera about her wedding dress, and their great chemistry....and man, it was like watching a train wreck in slow motion. But when you wrap up your entire life's hopes and dreams into this guy you've known for 2 weeks who you've never so much as kissed....that is a serious reach. What got me the most, was when she said, "I just wanted my daddy to be proud of me." Yeeesh. That was basically just an engraved invitation to therapy, girl. Get yourself some, fast.


The virginal divorcée.


Alright, enough about her. Let's move on to girls who have a shot. First off, is Bettina, who had her one on one with Brad and continued to play her hard-to-get routine. I think that's smart. Throw him off track about you being divorced (used goods) by making yourself seem virginal. Interesting tactic. He's definitely wanting more. And she does bring out a sweetness in Brad. I like that he's so supportive and patient with her, but I just don't think she's it. I think she's just kind of a mystery to him, and he's hanging around till he figures it out, but then he'll be done.


Group date cannonballs!


So the group date was hardly a date at all. It was basically a bikini party and a chance for Kristy to show, yet again, that she is the most boring woman in the world. How can you be that self-conscious and go on television???? It's a mystery.

I like Brad's chemistry with DeAnna. And I like her. That accent is just adorable and she is cute as a button. They seem genuinely relaxed and like they're crushing big time on each other! Of course, right after they had their sweet talk, he went and made out with Jenni. She's the big competition still.

Next was the other one-on-one, which went to Sheena. Now he's kept her around solely on the basis that his twin brother had a thing for her. That's just weird. But thank goodness he did, because Sheena gave us the most hilarious moment of the night which of course, I had to rewind and watch at least six times. I could watch that girl falling all night, it was so unbelievably hysterical. I mean the whole set-up of it -- with the dress, and the entrance and she's coming down the stairs and he's watching her.....boom. Wow, that just has to be the most embarrassing moment I can imagine, other than the top of her dress coming down. But at least that might have a sexiness factor to it! There is just nothing sexy or graceful or lovely about falling on your ass down a flight of stairs. Man, if she winds up marrying Brad, then MAYBE she might overcome her mortification over that. But even then, I'm not so sure. Actually, as a side-note: almost as embarrassing for her, in my opinion, was how many times she said "holy cow." Who says that over the age of six??


Sheena. Whatever.


Anyway, their date was nothing to write home about. Fancy dresses, diamond earrings, string quartet, first kiss in the moonlight....blah blah blah. See, the trick is having a night that is that romantic but there aren't seventeen producers organizing it. He didn't pick out those earrings, or arrange for the dresses or any of it! It's like romance in a can. Stale and old. Sure, it's the fantasy, the idea of romance, but not the real thing. I don't think there's real chemistry there. Just smoke and mirrors.

So, finally rose ceremony time. Or, crazy freak-out time! Tonight's episode was not about wondering who will go home? There was no doubt in my mind that Kristy would be the other girl sent home. There was zero going on there. And of course we knew since last week that Hillary got the boot. She's probably still crying!!

It's shaping up to be a good final four. I LOVE the home-town dates: crazy grandmas, subtle threats and overprotective fathers.....it's a good time. And it looks like this time around, it's Bettina who wins the "there's no way I'm marrying into that family" award. I think it's a race between DeAnna and Jenni. Weird. Two brunettes and two blonds. And I gotta give the edge to the brunettes. Besides, we all know, it's not about who has more fun, it's who gets the guy.

See you next week!!